I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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