I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
