I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I came so hard my ears popped.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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