I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
