Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
