you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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