You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
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