At least make sure they are 18
Why
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
