dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
