I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize