I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize