you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I think I am morally bankrupt
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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