what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
