i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
