the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
