How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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