does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
you never un-have a 4some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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