so explain again why im purple
no
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
