Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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