i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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