It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
