he wants to bone in the snuggie
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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