Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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