there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?