you guys were way drunker than both of me
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
