He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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