i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
