I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
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