Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
