i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
