But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
