Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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