dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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