you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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