She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
