my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.