hotel room ftw
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
