I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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