I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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