i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
