i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
It's rum buckets o'clock
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
