i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
my liver is dry heaving
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
