Can Purell be used as lube?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
