you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
