i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
