At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
