is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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