i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
