im gay
i know
yea but for you.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize