Whod you bang
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
