New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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